Why You Don’t Have to Be the Perfect Parent (or Leader) During the Summer Holidays
Summer is here, and if you’re a working parent, especially one leading a team or running a business, you might already be feeling the pressure to be everything to everyone.
You’re still expected to show up for your role. Your team or business needs your attention. But at the same time, there are children at home, holiday logistics to coordinate, and an invisible pressure to create magical summer memories.
And underneath it all, a quiet question starts to creep in:
“What version of me am I supposed to be right now?”
The present, patient parent?
The reliable, strategic leader?
The one who always keeps things running smoothly?
The person who seems like they’ve got it all under control?
Trying to do it all (perfectly of course!) is exhausting!
The Pressure to Be a Perfect Parent and a Capable Leader
Summer can quietly trigger something many of us don’t talk about: the identity strain that comes from trying to switch roles constantly, without losing ourselves in the process.
At work, you might still be in demand - managing people, solving problems, and keeping momentum going despite half the team being on annual leave.
At home, you’re being asked to be emotionally available, endlessly flexible, and highly entertaining.
And let’s not forget the inner voice that says:
“You should be making the most of this time.”
“You’re lucky to have this flexibility - don’t complain.”
“You should be doing more.”
“You chose this”
When you’re a working parent, that mental load can pile up quickly.
Why Is Summer So Hard for Working Parents?
Because the usual system doesn’t fit.
During term time, you’ve likely built a structure around your days — childcare, school hours, a routine. In summer, that scaffolding disappears. The lines blur between work and parenting, productivity and presence, being available for your team and being available for your family.
Even when you’re technically “off,” your brain is still spinning. You’re planning meals, booking holiday clubs, remembering sunscreen, catching up on emails, and somewhere in between, trying to keep a sense of identity (and sanity) intact.
It’s no wonder that so many working parents feel stretched thin — and quietly wonder where they’ve gone in the process.
The Hidden Cost of Doing It All
Trying to live up to the standard of the perfect parent and the capable, composed professional comes at a cost.
It can look like:
Saying yes to everything, and resenting most of it
Feeling disconnected: from work, your kids and yourself
Doing “just one more thing” before bed every night
Losing the joy in both your parenting and your professional life
Being in a constant low-level state of guilt, no matter where you are
You might be coping well on the outside but if it’s draining you internally, something needs to shift.
You Don’t Need to Be Perfect This Summer
Here’s the reminder you might need most right now:
You don’t have to be perfect. Not at home. Not at work. Not anywhere.
You’re allowed to have limits.
You’re allowed to say “this is too much.”
You’re allowed to need time and space for yourself… even during the school holidays.
Perfection isn’t the goal. Presence, clarity, and permission are.
Permission to drop the unrealistic standards.
Permission to protect your energy.
Permission to choose what matters to you: even if that means saying no to something (or someone) else.
A Coaching Question to Consider
If you stopped trying to be the ideal version of yourself for everyone else, what would you want this summer to feel like?
Not for your kids.
Not for your team.
Not for your reputation.
Just for you.
Start there.
Ready to Find Breathing Space?
If you’re feeling stretched between roles - showing up, holding it all together, but never quite feeling present — you’re not alone. It’s easy to look capable on the outside while feeling quietly overwhelmed underneath.
Coaching offers a protected space to pause, step out of the noise, and reconnect with what really matters to you — beyond the to-do lists and expectations.
If that sounds like something you’d value right now, I offer chemistry sessions: a relaxed, no-pressure conversation to explore whether coaching feels like the right fit.